Fake pretence

2012-01-30T23:28:00.001+08:00

“Relationships are never easy. Some days you’re going to wake up and that love you know you have for the person in the bed next to you, isn’t going to come so naturally. We always say “no one told us it was going to be this hard” but they did. We choose not to listen because it seems so unreasonable that one day, you will find yourself doubting your love for that person. The only way you can make a relationship last is if you work at it every day and never give up on it. Because if you fight and argue and quarrel with that person and still can’t imagine leaving them, then you love them. And that’s the kind of love that’s forever.”

Alive

2012-01-29T23:36:00.002+08:00

1. Lack of stamina. 1 month of school down, 1 more month to go.
2. Still alive
3. Lack of time
4. Need proper time management
5. Still ugly.
6. Still fat.
7. Still sad.
8. Still moody.
9. 1 Submission, 4 presentations, 6 tests, 3 exams to go.
10. HELP.

It's been really hard for me to get by, I think I need all the emotional support I have/ I can get.
Take pity on me life, I'm getting really tired......
I want to cry.

2012-01-24T21:23:00.001+08:00

2012-01-18T23:20:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I feel that you don't bother trying to break my brick wall down...
Good or bad?
As I stay struggling in this miserable whirlpool of thoughts, I can swim but I can't survive.
And you slowly see me drowning, but you don't exactly know why.

Superhyperlee

2012-01-16T00:33:00.001+08:00

Guess I won't be posting any pictures of myself anytime soon, maybe till June?
Self esteem and confidence really hitting the rock bottom and I really dislike the way I look and I get uncomfortable everytime I wear any clothes that're not jerseys...
And with CNY just round the corner I doubt I will lose weight that fast.
Still the same old, stuck with projects, suffocating under all the stress but still manage to find time to blog instead of researching on relevant information.
Life of a year 2.2 student, 5wks till the semester ends I hope it pass by quickly and i get my well deserved break before my internship of 4months start...
Sigh. With my future being so bleak maybe I should join the army too.

Wanna thank god for bringing @superhyperlee into my life, he makes me happy and I hope he feels the same too. And of course him loving me the way I look and the way I am, although he gets quite frustrated with my insecurities at times... It's such a blessing to have him by my side and no matter how bad 2012 can get, I know I can always count on him to chase the dark clouds from my sky away.
New phase of army life, hope everything goes smoothly for you loverboy.
Love you long time. :*

Year of change.

2012-01-09T18:00:00.000+08:00

By june, watch me.

Runaway

2012-01-08T01:21:00.001+08:00

(miss my old hair a lil too much)

"When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep.
Stuck in reverse."
Barely hanging on but I know I've to pull through.
Stepped on the weighing scale yesterday and realised how much weight I've put on over the months...
Scary enough. Time to control my food intake.
"Exercise as much as you eat and nothing will go wrong"
Happy POP my dearest.

One step closer.

2012-01-05T23:20:00.000+08:00

Missing my old hair right now, my current hairstyle is just pretty, screwed up.
So is my complexion, and all aspects of my physical appearance.
#wishlist2012 out grow my bangs (yes bloody itchy hands), go for hair treatment, maybe straighten my hair (idk bout that, should i?), and lastly leave my hair as it is to grow as long as possible....
Even makeover takes time right!
Okay the reason why I'm here is probably because of me procrastinating as I'm still trying to complete my INTHT individual assignment. Yup, and prolly the lack of sleep within this few days is draining me out. My schedule for January is.... SCARY. And I'm probably freaking out from the thought of it.
Hating projects with people I'm unfamiliar with... #foreveralone but hey, week 1 outta 7 is gna be over soon.
I can do this! Just need to be more consistent and I think I will do just fine....
Survived day 3 of school, and it's day 4 tomorrow with 2 submissions and it will be the end of week 1.
Nothing I cannot conquer. Let's go!

//edit: it's 415AM right now and boy am I glad to say that I'm finally done with my INTHT proj!
Now it's time for some space planning loving hurhur

Materialistic.

2012-01-04T14:37:00.001+08:00

Touching on the term materialistic, what does it exactly mean?

adjective

excessively concerned with physical comforts or the acquisition of material things rather than spiritual, intellectual, moral, or cultural values.

So by saying that one is materialistic means that he/she pursues not the spiritual healthy stuffs but instead craves for physical stuffs like money, cars and credit cards?

And how do you determine when one is materialistic?

When you offer to give he/she a ride home?

Or when you buy gifts on your own accord?

I think I do need some enlightenment here, I can't seem to grasp the meaning fully. Isit just me or?

In my own perception, when you classify someone as materialistic, you say that he/she only wants money and diamonds and all the things feelings can't give.

So say if you're in a r/s and your partner demands diamonds and money for shopping and uses you as a free chauffeur. Is he/she materialistic? I would say it's a yes.

But say that you're in a r/s and your partner presents you gifts and sends you around on his/her own accord, are you materialistic? I dare say that it will be a no, because it's out of free will, and own accord. Nobody is pointing any gun to your head.

Too bad that whenever a r/s ends, it always have to turn bitter and one party just decides to start saying something untrue and of course friends from each party will take their side and who benefits from all these?

No one, because from the start there's no point in even starting something so redundant like this.

And I've got to understand, the whole world judges even if they do not know you. They see from the surface, hear from the others, then they make their judgement. They made it sound like they know you, they made it sound so easy to judge one's character. By judging others you're just showing how shallow you actually are. Depthless. So disappointed in the human race.

What more can I say? I do need to make a better judgement next time because this time, I've been proven both right and wrong. Right to let you go, wrong to have stayed.

Goodbye 2011, Hello 2012

2011-12-31T04:32:00.001+08:00

2011 has been a year full of lessons for me, and in one sentence to conclude this year, it shall be:
"All good things always come to an end, like a meteor shower, they never last."

Since I'm "pretty free" now, I shall do a reflection to round up my whole eventful year.

In 2011 I.....

Met up with my primary school friends after a year.

Got hospitalised and tried sucky hospital food

Surf and Sweat w CEBU and got 2nd placing

Waikiki with TPU

Played Open Circuit

Virgin trip to Cameron Highlands

Joined my first ENG WK0

First Gendermah

Sent dearest charms @fumbelina off to aussie...

TNS with @sandysaandy

Joined NYTP and played MUO

Became the Captain of TPU
Virgin trip to USS

BATAM Trip w/ classmates

JB Trip w NYTP

Late night hang outs w/ the guys

Summer league w/ TPU

ZD HATS

Got out of >a year long relationship
Having some fun in school...

Met old friends, made a wonderful new friend

Clubbing nights

Turned 19

First SUO

First GHS with Bulletproof and got 2nd

GENTING Trip w/ th hangouts

Got into a r/s w my crush (Dream come true hahahahaa)

TPU BBQ

TPU Gathering

Got a Bronze medal for POLITE w TPU

Study sessions

Meetups and dinners and haircuts

Come to think of it, year 2011 seemed so eventful. Might be one of my best and worst year ever, but nonetheless I am so glad and fortunate to have so many wonderful friends with me this year, and I hope it stays this way... Can't afford to lose them, they are too precious for me. As for the fun, they were fun while it lasted, with many small little details here and there, although there were not much pictures but virtual memories are good enough. To all the misery and unhappiness I hope to put it aside and have a fresh start in 2012, no doubt there are times when one feels tired but hey, nothing we human cannot overcome.

As strong and independent I am right now, in time to come, I will only get stronger as I grow up. Excited and nervous to see what's in store for me in 2012, I hope there will be lesser bumpy rides and more happiness. I will dictate my own happiness and no one shall interfere in my path or be an obstacle in my life anymore. I can go on and on and on and on but, I really need my beauty sleep or else I will prepare to suffer the consequences later on....

With that, goodbye 2011, hello 2012.

Have a happy new year everyone (:

We all deserve a shot at happiness.

Letting go.

2011-12-30T01:30:00.001+08:00

“You can try your hardest, you can do everything, but sometimes people just aren’t worth trying over anymore. They aren’t worth worrying about. It’s important to know when to let go of someone who only brings you down.”